It is to my misfortune to inform you that the results from
the personality disorder test you took last week in my office have
now arrived, with some startling results. While there are minor
disorders, one of the major disorders the test shows you suffer from is
paranoia. Major symptoms shown include: Unwillingness to forgive perceived insults, Excessive sensitivity
to setbacks, Distrustfulness and excessive self-reliance, Projection
of blame onto others, Consumption by anticipation of
betrayal, Combative and tenacious adherence to personal rights, and
finally, Relentless suspicion. Unfortunately for you, this will likely
not be easily treatable, as you will most likely not believe what I'm telling
you. So as of now, I won't reach out to you to give treatment. It's
up to you if you would like treatment. If you agree to come in for
treatment, please don't hesitate to contact me. I'm sorry for the
unfortunate news.
~Dr. Celli
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